… Hear Me Roar !
My ex-boyfriend used to refer to himself as the fine wine; that gets better with age. I laughed ( to hide both my anger and disdain) and begged to differ and used the most responsible ingredient for looks –genetics –to justify my aging process. But, deep inside I was terrified, to the point that I considered becoming more serious due to the newly discovered laughing lines.
He insisted I was wrong and threatened to look better than me in 20 years. Now we’ll never find out, he’s long gone and good riddance. But indeed I was wrong – that main ingredient for looks is confidence.
We all feed into the old tale; grey hair, wrinkles, and weathered hands are so appealing… ON MEN. Did you ever notice that Mr. Right could lose few inches off his waist? I bet not, because his social standing, intelligence, and that sexy smirk astonishes and overwhelms.
If men’s charisma is what makes us go gaga for them then why do we insist on spending our precious life on dying our hair, eating empty calories, and spending vacation money on botox. Shouldn’t our laughing lines serve as friendly reminders of how funny and awesome we are?
Perhaps we are still cavemen and cavewomen living in the modern world of equal sexes. Women seek out a hunter in their partners, the ones who’ve lived life and have wrinkles to prove it. Women, on the other hand, are viewed as the bearers and who else but a youthful, rosy cheeked, long haired beauty can give man a healthy child. Even Cleopatra, before sleeping with Julius Ceasar, said “only a woman with curves like these can bear you a son.” We live in the times when many women prioritize career, have a first child in their 40s, and can surely feed themselves. But society still insist on emphasizing men¹s wrinkles and airbrushing women¹s. What a shame!
If we allow ourselves be judged solely by the appearance we might stop voting, running for offices and reading Jane Austen.
It’s not about how blue your eyes are and how perfect your nose is. I know people with jaws sharper than Beatrix Kiddo’s sword, yet they’re constantly seeking reassurance in the tinted windows of parked cars. It’s not about how well educated you are (although, knowledge IS power). I know a musician who never willingly read a book in his life, but he can go on and on about rock bands that I have nil interest in, yet I can sit and be mesmerized by the movement of his lips (which btw- are nothing special).
It all comes down to this – confidence is in the state of mind, confidence dictates appeal, therefore if you want to look hot believe that you are hot.
Confidence is something you have to build; through life experience, books, movies, friends, family, you have to know thy self for the world to know you.
It’s like making a speech in front of a full of audience. If you prepare and know your subject you will nail it, if you slacked off on preparation to do your nails it’s not looking too good for you.
And I’m not at all suggesting to stop taking care of yourself, I’m merely suggesting to stop worrying so much. If we’re ever going to take something away from men, how about their I’m-too-darn-sexy-for-my-age approach. When I was young and egoistic I used to put on my mom’s red lipstick on and kiss my reflection in the bathroom mirror. If I loved myself then, without front teeth and a boyish haircut, I can surely love myself with cellulite and saggy boobs, in 20 years!
Scary words huh? But what about balding heads and saggy balls that men get away with. While we’re wearing cover ups on the beach men are sun bathing their beer bellies, there’s something wrong with this.
Should I talk about Helen Mirren and her sex scene with a young guy in a movie?
