Definition of a Fanatic

(And you know this is never going to be you!)

Pick up those weights, ladies, get some definition, and do some real cardiovascular workouts. Rest assured it will take a lot more time and determination pumping iron than the majority of us have to turn us into a female Ah-nold. And you have to be in Caul-i-fournya to be that obsessed.

Thanksgiving’s been and gone. Unfortunately those extra pounds and ounces haven’t. They stayed behind, on your arms. thighs and yes, your behind. Unless you live under a rock, you must be very aware of the issues we are facing in America regarding health and obesity. (But of course you don’t live under a rock – there aren’t any rocks in New York, are there?) We eat more junk food and exercise less than at any other time in history. In an age where we are obsessed over what we look like, we are destroying our bodies in record numbers.

So in the midst of this growing epidemic – one of the largest health crises in our country and an entirely preventable situation – it drives me crazy when I hear how misinformed people are about fitness, especially as it relates to women. Despite the fact that on a basic level, male and female bodies are more the same than they are different, women have different diets, different exercise classes, and even different exercise equipment (think tiny, pink, ergonomically-pleasing Barbie dumbbells – barf). We have somehow developed this incredible notion that if a woman picks up a steel barbell, she will immediately resemble a body builder, lose all of her femininity, and generally terrify the public with her bulging veins and formidable pecs. Please, people, you’re smarter than that! Pedaling a stationary bike while reading a magazine or aimlessly lifting a five-pound dumbbell while you watch The Bachelor is a pointless waste of your precious time. And frankly, it’s embarrassing.

Women’s and men’s bodies have a primary key difference that keeps them from looking the same: hormones. Men have much more testosterone, which helps to build muscle. Women, however, still rely on testosterone to maintain bone density, muscle mass, and just as importantly, libido. Women naturally have less muscle tone and more fat, but muscle boosts metabolism and helps burn fat, even when you aren’t exercising. Without working out, it is virtually impossible for most of the female population to even get close to the amount of muscle that the average male has; we have to work much harder to stay toned and firm. Translation: working out with weights will not turn you into the Hulk. It just won’t. And you should be making a point to build muscle because it keeps you fitter, healthier, and looking better.
And really, what’s wrong with a bit of muscle anyway? Why are we so scared to see women who look strong and capable? We seem much more at ease with women hyper-feminizing themselves to an unnatural degree (nose jobs, lip jobs, and boob jobs, oh my!) than seeing a woman with a bit of muscle tone. It is entirely possible to have curves and muscle at the same time.

I think there are few things more disturbing than skinny, frail women with no discernible muscle tone. In the caveman days, when you actually had to have a fine-tuned body to survive, you wouldn’t have lasted an hour. Furthermore, a toned body looks better in and out of clothes; it serves you better in your daily activities, and it keeps you healthier as you age. It saves you money in medical bills, it makes chores like moving a couch or picking up a box much easier, and it makes men want to touch your biceps in awe and appreciation. I’ve yet to come across a negative aspect to being fit.

I happen to be part of a gym that specializes in a combination of gymnastics, cardio and Olympic lifting. At this gym, women from every walk of life strip down to shorts and tank tops and do pull ups, dead-lifts, handstands, and squats with the best of them. They are as comfortable in front of a squat rack as they are in a boardroom, and they look as good in sweat pants as they do in a cocktail dress. They are feminine and beautiful, but strong and useful as well. They have a confidence that can only come from being able to do more push-ups than the guy next to them.

I think we women don’t give ourselves enough credit. If we want, we can have it all; we can be strong, sweet, smart, fun, aggressive, and successful. And we can choose to sweat, to work hard, and to shape our bodies into something truly magnificent, rather than waste our time in a fancy gym without ever breaking a sweat. Try a boot camp-style or Crossfit class; lift heavy things, work hard, get tired and sore. Try it once and tell me the idea of a little muscle doesn’t appeal to the cavewoman in you.